Your ego (or “me”) is part of the human Life And Your Relationship personality defined by Freud, the father of psychoanalysis. The ego is the version of your “me” that you can accept. It’s basically a story you tell yourself about who you are . It is the conscious, decision-making part of you that experiences and responds to the world and events around you.

So when uncomfortable, painful thoughts, situations or YourLatinMates.com feelings appear in your life, the ego most often activates the so-called defense mechanisms!

Defense mechanisms of natural stress responses. Sometimes very necessary because they protect you from pain, anxiety, difficult emotions so that you can function in everyday life despite the difficulties!  They are sometimes necessary, but if they are abused or if you are not aware of them, they can make it very difficult to maintain / build a relationship, good relationships, set boundaries, or they may obscure your understanding of the mechanisms by which you are standing still and unable to realize your dreams!

1. Denial / Refusal 

Refusal to accept reality or facts (even if they may be obvious to everyone around you). Denial is often used in relation to events that you feel are either too painful or too difficult to confront. While sometimes postponing some painful analysis is natural or necessary, if it is a permanent mechanism, it can block your life for a long time and at the same time prevent you from building a lasting, stable sense of value – more about it in the video – link

2. Projection 

It consists in assigning to others your own undesirable feelings, views, behaviors or most often negative features. A projection is a reformulation of a situation or feeling so that you start to perceive it in an inverted way – as directed at you, not from you, e.g. you can cause negative situations YourLatinMates yourself, but then become the victim.

3. Exchange / Exchange – Life And Your Relationship

Throwing your negative emotions / aggression onto another person or even an inanimate object, because it is less dangerous than expressing your feelings directly towards the right person, e.g. you may experience frustration at work, but discharge your anger emotions on your loved ones because it is safer than showing real feelings towards the supervisor.

4. Procrastination or procrastination or procrastination

The tendency to procrastinate, postpone something and postpone something that manifests itself in various areas of life. This is procrastination, despite the awareness / feeling that inaction makes the situation worse. The procrastination is accompanied by a feeling that tomorrow will be better, circumstances will change. The very decision to act, even not to act, causes so much stress – sometimes unconscious. And therefore you can “create” new explanations for why the action “must” wait!

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5. Rationalization – Life And Your Relationship

Trying to explain or justify your inappropriate behavior, choices, “logical” reasons, even if deep down you know, is really not moral / appropriate.

I hope these few examples will help you identify the mechanisms in your life! Remember, although our ego defense mechanisms are normal and can protect you in the short term. Being stuck in them for years, consciously or not, can very effectively hinder your relationship. With yourself (self-esteem) and with the environment.